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just shooting questions to the universe and hoping that when the right time comes I will receive some answers, or if not, I will be given something to enrich my life.

Saturday, August 27, 2011

Don't sell your soul

I just came back from a "Tabor experience", you know those experiences where you really feel so enthusiastic and so positive you have a feeling you could conquer the world.
Last week, at this same time, I was in Cuatro Vientos, feeling so re-charged in my faith, and celebrating it without inhibitions, despite the scorching heat of the sun and the downpour in the evening. I know that faith in God is something personal, but it sure helps to belong to a community that shares it with you. It felt so good to be with normal, happy, everyday people who treasure the same values that I do, and who believe in the same God that I believe in.
Now, I am back to the lowlands, to everyday life.
We do not always feel the "highs" in life. Everyday life could be killing us with its plainness, ordinariness, monotony, etc. There are no formulas that will ensure a lasting dwelling on the plateau. Sooner or later we have to go down. It will not do to resist, because the "Tabor experience" is a gift freely given and not a fruit of our ability.
When everyday life's ordinariness touches us so deeply, we often run around and look for things and persons to appease this feeling of emptiness. We don't want to go through the experience of being insecure because it is a frightening experience and we always want to be assured.
Maybe this was what Jesus felt when, after forty days of fasting and prayer in the desert, he was tempted by the devil. Temptations are invitations to choose the easy way out.
But Jesus invites us not to sell our soul. There is only one response to the aching of our heart: God. And this God freely gives himself to me. I just need to wait.

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